I shouldn’t knock the Guardian too much, however, because this week they had this great article by Sasha Petrova about having a hysterectomy at the young age of 32. For me, it’s an inspirational piece about taking the decision to not be defined by your faulty reproductive system, and how having a womb and being a woman are not contingent on one another.
You can read it here:
‘I was worried that in losing my womb, I’d lose my femininity’.
Petrova’s gynaecologist warned her that she might grieve ‘the loss of womanhood’ after her hysterectomy. Rationally, she knew her uterus was just an organ that had given her years of grief with disabling endometriosis. She never wanted children. But it seemed to hold symbolic power over some people, as if a woman without a womb were less of a woman.
Her experience gave her greater realisation that there’s no such thing as an easy, uncomplicated road to fulfilling your supposed biological role. Or, sometimes, not fulfilling it.
‘…I’m proud of the women who give up trying and adopt a child, or a dog, or decide to be happy not having children at all… I’m proud of many friends for whom having children is not a priority, despite their healthy wombs. And…I’m proud of myself for having made the decision to no longer be a slave to my malfunctioning reproductive system and reclaim my body’.
It isn’t an easy choice to have a hysterectomy, it brings its own physical fallout, but I think reading this will give solace to many.
I’m so glad this woman told her story! What good is womanhood if it’s a miserable existence? At some point decisions have to be made to improve the quality of life. This is the exact reason that I got an IUD (and may push for a hysterectomy at some point). My periods were so horrendous that they weren’t letting me live my life for a good two thirds of any given cycle. I wrestled with the decision to get one for a long time, because I knew that by getting it that I was eliminating whatever really small (and it was reeeeeealy small) chance of getting pregnant naturally that I had. I’m glad I did. While I don’t love the IUD for many reasons, I do prefer any negative effects of it to my old periods. Sometimes you have to say f*** convention and do what will make you happiest and healthiest.
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You’re so right; the physical crap that so many women are going through on a daily basis, any exposure like this story is inspirational I think
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Thank you for sharing this article and for your post! I had a hysterectomy in 2009 because of endometriosis, adenomyosis, and fibroid cysts (what a mess). It was a tough decision, but I am so glad I did it. I was miserable and feel like I got a huge chunk of my life back as a result.
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I’m really glad it worked out well for you. It’s not something you do lightly at all; it’s great to hear positive stories
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I love the quote in the second last paragraph. Pride! We need more of that!
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Your comments above remind me of that old Gloria Steinem essay about “if men had periods.” 😉 Like infertility, there is a silence/taboo around discussions of menstruation and the mess and pain that go with it. Something else that needs to change!
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Who knows what the world would be like if men did have them?? I’d kind of love for it to happen overnight, just to see
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Powerful piece. I am so glad people are finally talking about this in media. I also think that any woman, no matter at what age, should be allowed to get a hysterectomy. I don’t ever want to have children and I’m planning on getting one once I’m like 25, but I know it’s going to be really hard bc for some reasons gynos think that they have sole weird control over your productivity. I am also so tired of people telling me that I’ll change my mind about not having children. They would never say this to someone who wanted to have children.
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There’s definitely a reluctance (refusal?) to let women own their own bodies….
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Yup, same with the abortion debate
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*reproductivity
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